This quote was such a revelation to me. I can remember my senior year of high school, feeling tired, and cold, and PMSing, and feeling guilty for wearing sweats and no makeup. And that's ridiculous! You don't owe anyone pretty, just because you're female. Life is like a massage- just undress to your level of comfort. Okay, I put that because I thought it was funny. Probably do keep some clothes on, I'd hate to see anyone charged with public indecency- but up to that point, just chase your dream. Because you don't owe anyone prettiness.
This is from a really awesome speech he gives, which is full of adult language, including profanity and repeated use of the word "oceanographer."
Watch if you have time, it's incredible. Essentially, his point is that your past self is not only likely much dumber than you are, but they literally don't exist. Which is a really liberating realization.
I don't think I can do justice in type to how incredible this quote is to me. Viktor Frankl survived the Holocaust, endured torture, and lost so many of his loved ones. He later wrote Man's Search For Meaning, including the eloquent quote above. This resonates with me personally because I like to do this fun thing where I have an existential crisis every couple of months. I look around at the horrible things that have happened, and continue to happen, at all of the suffering that is possible, and I wonder what the point is, how it could ever be worth it. This quote never ceases to give me hope. It's amazing that a man who experienced so fully all the misery of life can write with such beauty and conviction of hope, and of meaning.
It's also helped me put into words what I've felt all my life- that there is something transcendent about love, and human relationships.
This just plain makes sense. For me, this quote is all about three things:
1. Circle of influence vs. circle of concern, Seven Habits style.
Like, wow, it would be hella great if my math class weren't so freaking hard, but that's a little out of my circle of influence. You know what's within my circle of influence, though? Doing my math homework. It's all about fixing the things you can fix, and not worrying about the rest. For me this means spending a lot less time thinking about North Korea and a lot more time thinking about cleaning my bedroom.
2. ANTHROPOLOGY!!!! I get so excited about this stuff. So. I think it's pretty obvious that you couldn't take on a tiger in a cage match, right? Or even a chimpanzee? Or probably even a moderately sized coyote? And yet here you are, enjoying your life at the top of the food chain, never having been torn limb from limb by the astonishingly dexterous hands of a chimpanzee. This is because the thing that makes humans survive isn't strength, it isn't sharp teeth, it isn't any one adaptation: it's adaptability itself. Humans have astonishing neural and behavioral plasticity and can adapt to survive incredible circumstances. So do what you were born to do: adapt. Take your incredible circumstances and adjust your sails, because that's what humans do best.
3. Get tough. This is perhaps one of the most lasting pieces of advice my dad has ever given, and I'm not even certain he ever said it directly to me. He's a wrestling and football coach, and one year I helped out by taking stats for the team. At a long, ten hour day tournament, he was coaching one of the dozens of matches that would take place. I watched as one of his best wrestlers struggled to pin his man- he was so close, nearly had him. My dad called out just two words to him: "get tough." And he did; a look of determination came across his face and he pushed the final distance to win the match. "Get tough" may not seem all that profound, I realize. But as I went through the rest of high school, miserable, long track practices and sleepless nights as finals and graduation approached, I realized how much those words meant. Sometimes the only way to do it is to do it. To just keep moving forward, keep working, and get tough. Sometimes the winds will be a hurricane, and all you can do is adjust the sails.
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